Krishna Kaka

This blog entry is dedicated to ‘Krishna Kaka’. And you will come to know ‘why’ very soon.

Krishna kaka is known to my family for past 9 years since he started working for a part time job in my dad’s office. Having native place in Konkan, he came to Mumbai in search of a job. Later he got a job of conductor in TMC on contract basis and he started working for part time in my dad’s office. Quite famous for his ever helpful nature he instantly created a place in everybody’s heart in office. Name any kind of work and Krishna Kaka is all set to do it…and that too without complaining. Never say no to anyone and help everyone who ever is in need. It may not be a financial help but when it comes to helping in wedding or pooja related chores or spending night in a hospital when someone is seriously ill, Krishna kaka is there for you. Name any wedding in Malwan and Krishna kaka, in some way or other, is related to bride or groom. Such an affectionate personality he is, who keeps making friends and no foes at all.

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It was a May afternoon. Krishna kaka came to our house to give some papers to dad. He was not feeling well for some days. Mom asked him about his treatment. He said that his lungs were filled with a fluid. And he had an appointment on the same day with doctor to remove that liquid from his lungs. Mom obviously scolded him for not taking proper rest. Working from morning to evening in dad’s office and then night shift in TMC was taking its toll on him. But he wasn’t very keen on slowing down. Having two children, one 5 year old and one 5 month old, he was not letting himself to fall short of any efforts to give them a good life. Mom n dad advised him to be more careful about health and then he went for his treatment.

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Almost 15 days later, he got admitted to Bombay hospital. Clearly things were not going well. Doctors said liquid formation in his lungs was because of tuberculosis (TB). That liquid was sent for further tests. And on that worst day we got news that liquid tested positive for Cancer. Krishna kaka was suffering from lung cancer and that too in advanced stage. For a moment my brain stopped working when I first heard this news. Lung cancer?? And that too without any smoking habits?? How is it possible? Can reports go wrong? And so on. Everyone who knew Krishna kaka was shattered to hear this. Doctor suggested rounds of chemotherapy. It wasn’t easy for his family as well. His wife being housewife was in no position to arrange for 2.5 to 3 lakh rupees for his treatment. When dad visited him in hospital he looked quite calm. He just told dad, “I know I am having cancer. But I want to live and I am going try very hard for it.” It was his goodwill which paid off at the time of crisis. His friends and colleagues in office helped generously to collect almost Rs.2.7 lakh for his treatment. While contributing, everyone wished that Krishna should get cured. And the treatment took off.

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It was my birthday. I got a call. Krishna kaka was on line from hospital. He wished me and gave his blessings. I didn’t know what to say. I just asked him to get well soon and come home so that we can celebrate together. And a thought struck my mind if I will keep getting his wishes and blessing on my next birthdays.

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A month later, one evening Krishna kaka came home. I was studying something when he came. I met him for the first time since he started his cancer treatment. Two chemoes were over. He was wearing a cap as he lost his hair during treatment. But he was having the same smile on his face which he always used to have before the illness. He was waiting for my dad to return home. And I was wondering what to say and how to say. I never found myself falling short of words while talking to him before. But that day I just couldn’t start. I asked, “How is treatment going on?” He said, “Everything going on well. Its little bit painful on the next day of treatment as chemo creates a lot of heat in the body. But it’s fine. I always knew it was not going to be easy. Doctors are thinking of removing a portion of lung. But with that it will be difficult for me to take up any hectic work. Still I am considering that surgery option if it is going to fetch me few more years of life.” I was awestruck to see how calmly he was telling all these things. He continued, “Initially even I felt sad thinking why me? I never had any bad habits like smoking. Not in my dreams I thought that I would suffer from cancer. Then why did it happen. But then I thought there is no point in thinking over it. All I know, is I have a family to support. They are dependent on me. And I can’t leave them midway in life. If at all I have to leave then it’s only after making proper provisions for them. And for that I need few more years of life. So I have decided…come what may be….I will fight back. I am not going to lose so easily.” I was speechless. He wasn’t taking any confidence boosting class for me. But at that moment I thought forget about those personality building books. Even without reading single book of those kinds, this man knew how to fight back and how to keep his morale high in such a bad time. Life is a harsh teacher and it taught him never to give up. I simply added, “Your goodwill is so strong that it will certainly pay off. People whom you have helped in your entire life will definitely pray to god to cure your illness. Just maintain this trust in God and more importantly trust in yourself. I am no one to tell you all this but today I learnt from you that if one can fight with death one can fight with any adverse thing in life and win it over.”

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Krishna kaka has now rejoined his part time job. He can’t exert himself much. But he keeps doing work as much as possible. Chemotherapy is stopped now. He is on a tablet course now. Doctors have said that his will power is working in his favor. Doctors from Tata hospital have said that lung surgery is not needed. The medicine course should help in suppressing the growth of cancer tissues.
His wife is taking care of his medicines, dosages. She knows that there is no certainty. But she has stood by his side in his war of life. His younger son is now 1 year old and is very happy to see his father around him more often. His elder daughter doesn’t pester him much with her questions as she knows that her dad needs to take rest when he comes home. Friends and relatives are also quite supportive and happy to see him back to work.

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In the beginning of this blog entry I said that there is a reason behind this entry. If you happen to read this quite lengthy blog and if you feel the same inspiration as I felt after talking to him then please do me a favor. Please pray for his longer life once. By good wishes, blessings, prayers if he can live longer then it will be of great help to him and me as well. Thanks.

At Pit Stop...

Hushhh….The qualifying sessions are over. It was quite strenuous. I am not at the starting grid though. I am somewhere towards the end. Why? Well, every question should have an answer. Engine is good. Wheels are fine. But track is bit slippery and full of turns. I fumbled on the turns. It wasn’t for the first time that I was driving on such tracks. But maybe I lost my focus. Maybe I didn’t. Sometimes you do everything right just to realize that something is going wrong. This was one of such times.

I saw others finding it easy to register shorter times on track. And was wondering why I’m taking so long? This thinking about problem must have caused me to lose my focus. Need to get rid of all such issues before the Race day.

Thinking about those races where people starting from the back of the grid emerged as winners. Those races are remembered as their success stories. So it’s not impossible to win the race even though you are not at the pole position. It will just be more difficult. And more challenging too. One who is at the pole position has the challenge to maintain his position, maintain the competitive advantage of starting ahead of everybody. And one who starts at the end has to overtake everybody ahead of him. Conditions don’t favor him. And he is not considered amongst the potential winners. This alleviates the pressure of expectations. One should use this in his favor. Yes…I will use it in my favor.

Tomorrow, on Race day, I am going to go easy on some things. All I am going to do is to drive smartly. It doesn’t matter whom I am overtaking. All that matters is that I am moving ahead. I don’t have any point to prove to anyone. All I have is confidence that I can win.

I am at the pit stop looking at my car…the same one with which I have won races in the past. Just now my car got refueled. It got checked for all possible faults. It is looking as eager and confident as me. Both of us are ready to hit the track tomorrow. There is almost no one in the pit lane except us. I am listening to the roaring engines in the silence around me and my eyes are glued to the images of finish line and the chequered flag.